05 Sep 2008

Sarah Palin Averts World War III?

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Hear me out. For some time now I have been worried about an Israeli and/or American airstrike on Iran. (The financial implications are obvious: Ramp up your exposure to gold at least until the election has passed.) In a recent column, “September Surprise,” Justin Raimondo explains that Israel has been in secret negotiations with Georgia to use its airfields, making an Israeli attack a real possibility. If this is true, it puts obvious pressure on the United States to do it, since a U.S. attack is less likely to provoke an all-out war in the Middle East.

So what does Sarah Palin have to do with this, besides newsworthiness? I’ll tell you. The more likely it is that McCain will win in November, the less benefit of a US strike on Iran to the “War Party” (which is not identical to the Republican Party, and I use the term only because Raimondo does and I have yet to invent something better). In other words, if it looked like McCain was going to get trounced, a sudden American attack on Iran–in self-defense, it goes without saying–would possibly scare Americans into voting for the guy who has military experience. (This raises an interesting question: Should the Democrats try to start a race riot in late September? Maybe pay some police officers to beat up black suspects, and then pay some judges to give them a slap on the wrist? Oh wait, the government already does pay people to behave in this way. Never mind.)

But now, Sarah Palin has singlehandedly given the momentum back to the Republicans. I am ashamed to admit that I am now listening to media commentary about the Republican Convention, and I’m getting upset at the Obama camp’s attacks. I assure you, if they had said, “Mitt Romney eats Christians for breakfast!” I would not have cried foul. But for liberal Democrats to loudly wonder whether a mother of five is capable of holding an important job?!?! Are you kidding me!?!

So this is why Sarah Palin may have averted World War III and saved millions of lives. If the people who run the world (and they know who they are, though I do not) think McCain is probably going to win, then maybe they will hold off on bombing Iran.

Of course, Sarah Palin’s boss will probably order it himself in 2009, when inflation breaks an annualized rate of 10%. But I think the Iranians should still thank her for those extra 6 or 7 months.

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